Feeling Lucky/Creating Our Reality

This is going to be a short and impromptu post because we're driving back home today and I probably won't get online again until tomorrow.

I want to explore the idea of 'getting messages from the universe' and creating our reality.  When I logged on yesterday, I learned that I had been one of the winners of a 'Vega' shake-n-go protein powder sample from Averie's 'Love Veggies and Yoga' blog. This was a really powerful message for me for two reasons. First, I haven't tended to think of myself as lucky, and usually haven't entered giveaways, etc, because I've had no faith that I'd win. In this case, I dared myself to participate because I also wanted to support what Averie does with her blog, and really was interested in the product also. These additional reasons and just making the effort to participate seem to have rewarded me with the experience of feeling that I can be lucky sometimes too! Second, as I said, I admire Averie's energy, upbeat positivity, no-nonsense attitude, clarity, and many other attributes so much. Whilst I recognize that we are very different people, there are so many things that I see in her that I feel I should cultivate in myself. So, a great transfer of energy, and at a good time also.

How much of this is just serendipity, and how much of it is a sign from the universe helping me to create my reality for my highest good, which is also the good of all? I have been musing on this back and forth for some time - even one of the poems I posted a couple of weeks ago is about just that thing - and it's a constant question. (And what is the message of the fact that the internet in this cafe seems to be sketchy - I may not even get to post this before I have to leave?!)

I really want to believe that I can create my own reality in my highest good, for the good of all, but I recognize that I also fear the responsibility that entails, especially considering all the ill that I have wished myself and given myself when I have been depressed. What an amazing responsibility, to invite what is good into our lives, and also to swear off the negativity and ill-wishing, recognizing that it is truly damaging. I don't believe 'sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me:' I think I've been more hurt by words than by any painful accident or all the painful digestive troubles, both words from others and words to myself. Why would I keep choosing that? It takes time to break a habit, even a horrible one, but looking at it this way helps to motivate me to break it.