Reflections on Self Love - Love From Others & Confession of the Week

I've so been looking forward to writing this post today, because today's reflection on self love was an extremely powerfully expressed invitation to reflect on the love that we receive from others. When we're not being loving toward ourselves, we can tend to shun the love that comes to us from others and persuade ourselves that nobody loves us at all.

This is a trap that I've fallen into, and the timing was perfect, as I wanted to talk about something on similar lines as part of my confession for the week.

However: it's 10.30pm, we've had guests and then been guests all day except when I was preparing for their arrival, Phil is likely leaving for a week's hunting tomorrow and I have food to prepare for him, and I'm toast, so I'm not going to do the full justice to the subject that I'd been hoping to. I had all the photos uploaded (does this take ages for anyone else? I do it ahead of writing the post) but we just got home and I discovered I'd left the burner on the stove on! I'm horrified by this. I'd been sauteeing a couple of these beautiful beets to take with us

- and I guess we left in a bit of a rush.
Here's my latest no-sugar energy bar creation, drying under the fan - chia-sweet, mesquite, ground walnuts, ginger, cinnamon, nut pulp (so nice and fluffy now I can grind it in the Vita-Mix!) and flax meal.

I've realized that I really do need to give it some heat for the first portion of drying time - the fan doesn't penetrate to the center unless I make things very thin. I made all kinds of unusual-to-me creations - quiche lorraine, key lime pie - the last few days, glad to expand my repertoire of things I can make that the palates I live with appreciate! And huge salads from our garden, of course.

So, it's such a gift that we all have, that people love us - we're never truly an island except when we believe it so and isolate ourselves.
This reflection was so appropriate for me, as it ties in very well with a non-serving habit that I've been consciously trying to change starting this past week, and have been having some good results so far, I think.
I confess this non-serving habit: I have a tendency to interpret things in the most negative possible light, just as a reflex, almost. Even if someone gives me a compliment, I often think that they're really telling me that what I've done previously hasn't been adequate! Or if someone asks me why I'm doing something, I have been prone to taking it as an attack as opposed to just a question. This habit hasn't served my relationship with Phil, who is my best friend as well as my husband, and who looks out for me and tries to help me be my best. It has left him feeling untrusted and like he can't be transparent with me. It's because I value transparency so highly that I am dedicated to working on changing this attitude habit, of listening to what people say and ignoring the little voice that converts it instantly to something negative, of working instead to try and find a more uplifting meaning, something that would encourage me to feel good instead of bad.

I am so grateful to Phil for loving me (here we are on our anniversary last January)

and to everyone else who loves me too! I love you all as well.

There were other things I wanted to write about, but I can't even tell if I'm making coherent sense, I'm so tired!
Love and gratitude.